Irrepairable Loss

As the rain comes tumbling down,
The abyss in my heart deepens,
All happiness has drowned,
And the joy I felt departs.

The gloomy environment outside,

Reflects my mood within,
Stormy winds, thunder, high tide,
Inner silence makes up for the din.

Why did you go, oh beloved,

Leaving me to face the elements,
I am drenched in your memories,
Wedded to this loss, now permanent.

Oh the happy times spent together,

So many laughs and smiles exchanged,
Now I fall into despair like a feather,
That too with an unbounded range.

So many years gone by,

Yet it seems the other day,
When, in just one sigh,
That blast took you away.

The silence thunders through me,
It’s deafening, can't shut it out,
Only reunion can set me free,
Is that even possible? I doubt.

You live on inside me,

Filling my being with life,
Time heals but charges a fee:
Youth vanquished by internal strife.

P.S. The poem reflects imaginary ideas and bears no resemblance to any events or people in the poet's life. ;-)

The Six-Week Experience

Today was the last day of my internship at DRDO. I'm so glad that it's over. Not that it wasn't good, but the last week or so had become such a drag. I don't know how much I gained technically but I certainly met some interesting people.

There was of course that chance meeting with a long-forgotten school buddy. Then the textbook bumping into a college junior. This was all on the first day. Just when I was wondering how dreary could things get without a mobile phone (yeah, you read that right: no mobiles allowed....sigh), I got introduced to the group of gals with whom I would be spending the next six weeks of my life.

With some people you hit it off instantly, discovering each day how similar their ideas are to yours. And with others, that "click" doesn't happen even after spending quite some time together. Thankfully, this group fell into the first category. Okay, maybe not all of them, but at least none were in the second one.

One turned out to be a convent-schooled gal like me. That was a big converging point for us. It's amazing what a great influence your school environment has on you. We don't realize it but it does shape us in more ways than one. And how can I not mention her diligence and patience. Our project is complete mostly due to her efforts.

Another was a girl who is hard to forget. She fit the stereotype of girls-love-shopping-and-movies-and-eating-out so well. Yet she wasn't that hollow personality associated with the stereotype. I really admire her for her loving nature.

The other two people were a little more enigmatic. Maybe because they spoke less but, mostly, I think because we three chatter-boxes didn't give them much space!!

One thing for sure, the entire DRDO experience has seriously scared off any lingering doubts about a govt job. The whole one-big-tea-break thing and the lack of work may seem very appealing on the outside. But the total boredom that comes with the package deal, coupled with the zero job satisfaction is enough to cross out PSUs, govt jobs and their brethren from my list of options.

I just hope I don't have to take back my words when the placement season starts at college. Placements....now that is seriously one scary word!! All those well-meant assurances of everyone-gets placed-eventually notwithstanding.

Numero Uno

Well, as the title suggests, this is my first post. I still don't know why I created this blog. I guess it's going to be a place to share my soliloquies. I'm going to pour out all my innermost thoughts....well, almost all!! (some are best kept secret for obvious reasons!!)

It's amazing how your firsts are always so special, even if you have the most wonderful experiences later. (Like your first blog post!) They certainly are for me. The first movie I watched at a theatre (Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone). The first song I downloaded (In da club - 50 Cents). The first poem I wrote. My first best friend (in kindergarten!) The first holiday that I recollect (Mussoorie). My first mobile. Okay, now that's something that everyone remembers.

Then there are some totally absurd firsts that I remember. Like the first time I ate ham!! Or the first time I rode the monorail in the Rail Museum!!

Continuing on the subject of firsts, it's quite strange how you never completely get over your first crush. Even if the person hurts you in a million ways, crushes your self-esteem with his boot heel and then walks off into the sunset without so much as a backward glance. Okay, maybe you do get over such a jerk! But then nobody is really so bad and feelings tend to linger. At least some teeny-weeny bit does. I'm sure many may disagree with me but then, hey, that's my opinion! And you're entitled to yours!

That should give you an idea about how this blog is going to be. My opinion really on everything that I have an opinion on. And you're welcome to differ and air yours through your comments!

I guess that's about it for the first post. Still getting used to the idea of baring my soul!